Bojan Scores
Cameraman
Terry you’re very devious when a bird’s involved...
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Post by Bojan Scores on Sept 12, 2018 22:06:29 GMT
Car 67 by Driver 67 was ridiculously dull. Look at me by Gerri Helliwell a triumph of hype to push a billy no tune into the charts. Lily was Here by Candy Dulpher is like the music you listen to on the phone whilst waiting for an insurance quote. Popcorn by Hot Butter sounds like the music on a ZX Spectrum computer game. Achy Breaky Heart by Billy Ray Cyrus utterly dreadful.
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Post by Steve Austin on Sept 12, 2018 22:52:14 GMT
Party Fears Two by The Associates, it's just so bad. The tune itself is OK but the vocal is just dreadful.
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Post by Dirty Epic on Sept 13, 2018 13:27:14 GMT
Can’t argue with the choices so far as there are some truly awful records here!
Here’s a rundown of a few on DE’s hit list of pet hate bad songs, artists and general rubbish. Apologies to anyone who actually likes these acts/songs but here’s my opinions of them:
• Kylie Minogue – The Locomotion, leave it out S/A/W absolutely putrid compared to Little Eva’s original! • 2 Unlimited – No Limits, awful and set back the real ‘techno’ and innovators in the electronic music scene in the 90’s 10 years! • Psy – Gangnam Style, awful pony millions lap up! • Oasis – Stand by Me & All Around the World, being very harsh adding Oasis to this list but these two tracks just smack of the Gallagher brothers being lazy thinking of their next line or £1m coming into the bank here! • Adelle – Hello, like most of her material this one’s schmaltzy bland ballad which goes nowhere. Don’t see why she’s so popular a definite case of the bland leading the blind! • Aqua – Barbie Girl/Doctor Jones, hmm not much you can say about these two except *@&!. • Jive Bunny & the Mixmasters (sic) – various, god I absolutely detested this when it raised it’s ugly head in ’89 used as torture by some regimes I hear. STILL DO! • Robson & Jerome – I Believe, could be any one of their songs (sic) they did but this is Simon Cowell at his worst! Reminds me of Father Ted’s Song for Europe yet the public lapped it up like cats with cream. Absolutely nasty and no wonder it got used in a painkiller advert recently. • Eurotrash Dance Acts – various, thanks a lot you lot do more to put people off the innovative side of electronic dance music than those who bad mouth it. Strangely enough this rubbish goes to the top of the charts when the good stuff in the House/Techno/Electronic scene’s get’s ignored. • Wheatus – Teenage Dirtbag, radio friendly Mom and Pop American bland rock can’t even lump it with that Nu-Metal crap it’s so bland! • Puff Daddy – I’ll be Missing You, erm if I’m right didn’t your ‘gangsta’ posturing contribute to the death of your friend Puff? (sic). A disgustingly awful cash in on a tragic event which IMHO and sums up everything that went wrong with the Rap/Hip Hop scene when these tossers became the big force within it! • Gareth Gates – various, the only interesting thing about him was his stammer. Next! • Dodgy – Good Enough, The Bluetones – Slight Return & Boo Radleys – Wake Up Boo!, in essence they’re not particularly bad songs but for me they’re just boring examples of the laziness of the Britpop era when any old thing like this would be signed up, promoted to death and get to the Top 10. They just seemed ‘easy listening’ for the middle-class student brigade when in the mid 90’s there was much better indie stuff than this knocking around which do anything! • Abba – Mamma Mia, not going to make me popular on here but never really seen the mass appeal of Abba and this track in particular seems done to death at every bland party, function, wedding etc. Theresa May’s favourites apparently… • Boyzone/Westlife – various, absolutely no redeeming features both musically and individually. Nuff said! • Bombalurina – Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Yellow Polka Dot Bikini, the absolute pits this one. Also Timmy Mallett is one of those your fist wouldn’t tire punching etc. • The Pussycat Dolls – Don’t Cha, the personality vacuum Nicole Sherzinger’s made her name on this track. A bit like Little Mix (see below) songs like this totally dis-empowers women IMHO. • Technohead – I Wanna Be a Hippy, god this is awful! • Charlie Puth/Megan Trainor – Marvin Gaye Goin On’, everytime I hear this I want to smash the radio/TV etc. • Sonia – various, another S/A/W puppet irritating individual too! • Primal Scream – County Girl, I actually quite like Primal Scream but when they do pedestrian stuff like this they try my patience sometimes. Was this really the same band who did the XTMNTR album only 6 years earlier? • Ellie Golding – All of Me, just a auto-tuned dirge used in an crap bland Bridget Jones film for me! • The Cheeky Girls – The Cheeky Song (Touch My Bum), naff reality TV spin off crap lets hope this pair don’t re-appear again! • One Direction – various, I’ll take another direction than these Cowell puppets thanks. • Black Eyed Peas – Time of My Life, could have been anyone of their EDM-lite songs. Detest this bunch along with many of the other R&B acts which jumped on the EDM bandwagon (see David Guetta and Calvin Harris) in the late 2000’s when the R&B scene totally ignored the real House/Techno scene for two decades… pity they never continued ignoring it! Also don't like the film it comes from either! • Leona Lewis – Keep Bleeding, here we go with Simon Cowell’s British Mariah Carey (see later) clone. All of the paint by numbers philosophy Cowell has to making (and selling) music is here and the masses are too dumb to know they’re being cheated with this and the repeated clone of this Cowell comes up with next! • Jason Donovan – Sealed with a Kiss, when S/A/W uses a bland soap star to do a unforgettable/unnecessary cover version. Did the world really need this? Hopefully forgotten! • Little Mix – Shout out to My Ex, like long nails down a blackboard this is very, very irritating. Also it’s extremely contradictory as these Cowell ‘slaves’ are doing everything which dis-empowers women FFS! • Black Lace – Agadoo, no wonder Oz kicked Arthur’s jukebox in AWP when confronted with this ditty. • 1980’s Whitesnake/Def Leppard/Poison/Skid Row/Bon Jovi etc. – various, the worst examples of ‘Soft’ (sick) Metal and Cock Rock, no wonder Grunge emerged next! • Grange Hill Cast – Just Say No!, typical TV spin off fair. What makes this one more interesting is some of the cast where on a ‘drug’ of some form while making this anti-drug anthem LOL! • Smart E’s – Sesame’s Treet & Urban Hype – A Trip to Trumpton, thanks lads for killing the rave scene with these dog-awful tracks. Still you ushered in a more innovative dance scene which reacted to this cartoon-rave balls! • Drake – God’s Plan, just seems like some pot-smoking ner-do-well from Canada mumbling nonsense over a boring Hip Hop beat. Does nothing anyone else can’t do IMHO! • The Corrs – Runaway, ugh twee feel-good professional-Oi’rish pop at it’s worst. Could almost be the Ballykissangel theme and that was bad too! • Peter Andre – Mysterious Girl, don’t get me started on the cod-Reggae chatter on this. Soap stars should be banned from anything to do with music • Eurythmics – There Must Be an Angel (Playing with My Heart), just something about this one I can’t stand. • Supergrass – Alright, again I won’t be popular here mentioning this one but for some reason just don’t like this song nor Supergrass in general always thought they were hyped up by the media much more than their talent should have seen them be! • Stormzy – Big For Your Boots, can’t stand this individual along with many others like him in the Grime scene. Stormzy and the other acts in this scene bang on about poverty, being the victim and discrimination at every turn yet they very happily promote, condone and lets be honest encourage a violent, criminal, ‘Gangsta’ lifestyle in their songs and general media personas. They don’t act/live like this in real life but the hordes who love them/this stuff do and perhaps that’s more the reason why things are like they are right now and they’re not exactly helping matters on that score for sure. Also for someone who is down with ‘the street’ etc. he’s very close to/collaborated with Simon Cowell and many other bland mass media darlings so makes me thing it’s all hype, all bluff! • Mr Blobby – Mr Blobby, who exactly likes this tosh let alone buys it and worse put’s it at number 1! As for Noel Edmunds... • Jason Derulo – Want Me to Want You, more R&B pony about a horny bloke who can’t wait to… Hollywood-land crap music for the dregs and mind numbingly boring IMHO. • The KLF – Justified and Ancient/America What Time is Love, I really like the KLF and their little foibles but even have to admit this was when the joke wore thin and even Bill and Jimmy themselves had, had enough of it all. Not a patch on what they were doing a year or two earlier! • (P)Rick Astley – Never Gonna Give You Up, the quintessential S/A/W song. I hate this and Mr Astley with a passion and for the life of me WTF with the popularity generated for this from this ‘Rickrolling’ tosh? A Cry For Help which was also *&%@ was better! • Mariah Carey – All I Want For Christmas Is You, we’ll soon be suffering this awful Xmas ‘anthem’ to death! In fact don’t really see the reason why this talentless ‘diva’ is so popular. Apparently she’s the blueprint that Cowell follows for his X-Factor slaves… sorry acts. • Underworld – Born Slippy, behave myself… just kidding LOL!
Yes apologies if anyone on here likes anything on this list and again for some people these songs will be the greatest things they’ve ever heard and I’m sure a lot of the stuff I like may engender similar feelings for some people too.
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Cartman
Producer
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Post by Cartman on Sept 13, 2018 14:24:38 GMT
A truly epic list, Dirty!
Cant argue with the inclusion of plenty of SAW cack, they summed up the awfulness of the mid/late 80s for me
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Post by D.C. Burtonshaw on Sept 13, 2018 19:19:45 GMT
Can't disagree with any of that DE!!
Has anybody mentioned Carole Bayer Sagers "You're moving out today"?
And "Macarena" by Los Del Rio
That stupid one that goes "Oh oh we're in trouble" (Shampoo)
and the "Saturday night, lala lala lala, laa laa" (Whatever the heck it is........grrrr) Oh yeah, Whigfield
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The Saint
Moderator
Swinging London - 1967
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Post by The Saint on Sept 13, 2018 19:21:54 GMT
Has anybody mentioned Carole Bayer Sayer's "You're moving out today"?
I like that song! The Saint
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Post by D.C. Burtonshaw on Sept 13, 2018 19:24:20 GMT
Has anybody mentioned Carole Bayer Sayer's "You're moving out today"?
I like that song! The Saint Oops! I didn't think it was popular on the "old forum"! Oh well, different tastes etc - I actually don't mind Pharrell Williams TBH.
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The Saint
Moderator
Swinging London - 1967
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Post by The Saint on Sept 13, 2018 19:31:14 GMT
I like that song! The Saint Oops! I didn't think it was popular on the "old forum"! Oh well, different tastes etc - I actually don't mind Pharrell Williams TBH. It's probably not popular, but I like it even though it is a bit of a silly song! The Saint
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Post by Sam Tyler on Sept 13, 2018 21:26:05 GMT
Truly an epic list there from Dirty Epic although I must say that I'm quite partial to Def Leppard, Bon Jovi and Whitesnake but in mentioning those I'm sure you wouldn't like Aerosmith, Kiss, or Van Halen either? I like 'em! I've just thought of one other that really gets on my thruppennies, a one-hit-wonder that has netted the artist so many tours and appearances it beggars belief: Chesney f**ing Hawkes - I Am The One and Only How can one man string so much (and earn so much) out of one crap tune? Sam.
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Post by Arthur Pringle on Sept 13, 2018 22:54:25 GMT
Isn't the official worst song of all time 'Happy Birthday To You'? Closely followed by Stevie Wonder's 'Happy Birthday'.
Agadoo in a former life isn't too bad-
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